Divorcing With Kids
Divorcing With Kids
A divorce can be one of the most trying and difficult times in a person’s life—even if both parties will wind up being happier apart. Life was created and developed during the marriage, and if children are in the picture, this can make things more complicated and challenging. However, when an individual works with the right lawyer, they can have their questions answered and understand what the divorce process really involves.
There are a lot of things to consider during the dissolution of a marriage, and most often, the focus is on how assets will be divided and which spouse owes the other money and how much. While these are incredibly important aspects of the process, there are other things that need to be considered, including who will take care of the kids and visitation.
Even in the most friendly and cordial divorces, when it comes to family and determining if the mother or father will get the kids, things can turn ugly. Emotions tend to run high when it comes to deciding what’s best for the kids, and parents may have different (and conflicting) ideas on who can provide a better life for their children.
That’s when working with a professional is in everyone’s best interest. They’ll be able to take emotion out of the equation and do what’s best for the kids and the family. Below are some of the things that should be considered when it comes to the kids.
Should There be a Primary Caretaker or Joint Custody?
When determining if one parent should be the primary caretaker, it’s important to do what is best for the children. For example, if one parent travels extensively for their job or works late or untraditional hours but the other parent is home more often, then it might be better for the child to go with the parent who can be there on a regular basis.
Since the primary caretaker is responsible for making important decisions about the children’s well-being and lives, such as getting them medical care, keeping track of their school performance and regulating who they spend their time with, having someone around who can keep tabs on these things and get the child where they need to go is important.
If both parents work normal hours and plan to live in the same community (or at least close), then joint custody might be a better option. This gives both mother and father equal time with their kids and expects them to make joint decisions that are in the best interest of their children. This set-up only works if the parents can put their differences and emotions aside and commit to co-parenting their kids in a productive and loving way.
How Will Visitation be Split Up?
No matter what type of arrangement a family decides to enforce, whether establishing a primary caretaker or going with joint custody, it’s important to decide how the time will be divided. Will one parent have them for the vast majority of the week, while the other gets them on the weekend? Will they spend half of the week with one parent and the other half of the week with the other parent? Will they switch houses from week to week?
Not only do parents have to figure out where their children will be during the week, but it’s also a good idea to figure out where they will spend holidays. Most people always think about the big ones such as Thanksgiving and Christmas, but there are many other holidays that fall throughout the year. Deciding beforehand who the kids will be spending the holiday with can save a lot of trouble and heartache in the future.
For example, if one parent really enjoys spending Halloween with their children, then they may request that they always have this holiday with their kids. Since Mother’s Day and Father’s Day usually fall on the weekend, will the kids be with the person they are normally with during this time, or will exceptions be made? It’s also a good idea to determine who the kids will spend Spring Break with, or if this will rotate from year to year. Parents should also consider how the kids will celebrate their birthdays.
Figuring out what is best for your children might not be that easy, which is why it’s beneficial to work with a lawyer. Although every client’s situation is different, they have been involved with a variety of different cases in the past, so they might have a good idea of what will work and what won’t. If there are any disputes about who gets the kids, they will work for their client to find a solution that is satisfactory and in the best interest of the children.
What Expenses Will Each Party be Responsible for?
In a lot of divorce cases, one parent will have to pay child support to the other parent. This covers many of the expenses involved with raising kids, but it doesn’t cover them all. If there are any extra costs that need to be covered, such as medical or school expenses (including tuition, lunch fees or any extras) or costs associated with sports, among others, then it might be a good idea to decide how the parents will take care of these things.
It’s possible that the child support amount will be enough to take care of these costs, but if it's not, it could be hard to get the other parent to pay any extra. Putting a plan in place before the case is heard by a judge could relieve a lot of stress and worry (as well as frustration and anger) and make sure that the kids are being taken care of properly.
Work with a Professional
When it comes to ending a marriage, even if it’s in the best interest of the adults, it’s never an easy situation to deal with. There are a lot of emotions and issues that need to be addressed and resolved, and it can be hard to take care of these rationally.
There are no winners when a marriage is dissolved, and the kids can often end up suffering the most. It’s in everyone’s best interest to know their rights and responsibilities, and working with an experienced lawyer can help with that process.
At Ketover & Associates, LLC in Garden City, New York, we’ve helped people all over Long Island get through this incredibly trying time. We can answer any question when it comes to your kids and visitation or any other issues that might arise. Give us a call today.